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Lazio Woodentop
Joined: 17 Apr 2009
Posts: 28
Location: Japan
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 Posted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 1:28 pm Post subject: Please be gentle with me, I'm a virgin! Plus QUIZ |
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Hi Everyone
Been a big fan since Web Site Story. Got and read and re-read and re-re-read (etc etc) all the books. (Even got some rare 'uns!)
My favourite book is Witches of Chiswick, my lucky amphibian is an eft, my pet hate is having all my skin peeled off then being dipped in salt, and I'm a Capricorn (not really, I'm a Sagittarian but can't spell it)
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Ya buyin' all the products that they're sellin' ya.
Believin' all the lies that they're tellin' ya
They say "Jump", ya say "How high?"
Ya brain-dead. Ya got a feckin' bullet in ya head.
Last edited by Lazio Woodentop on Sat Apr 18, 2009 5:22 am; edited 1 time in total |
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Timmeh!
Site Admin
Joined: 17 Mar 2006
Posts: 849
Location: Brighton (well, Hove actually)
Display Name: Tim McGregor
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| Posted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 2:31 pm Post subject: Re: Please be gentle with me, I'm a virgin to this site! |
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Welcome, although before long you'll need to be over here: http://www.thegoldensprout.com/
| Lazio Woodentop wrote: | | My favourite book is Witches of Chiswick |
A fine choice 
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talie
Joined: 22 Jun 2006
Posts: 411
Location: In a tree
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| Posted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 5:47 pm Post subject: Re: Please be gentle with me, I'm a virgin to this site! |
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| Lazio Woodentop wrote: | Hi Everyone
Been a big fan since Web Site Story. Got and read and re-read and re-re-read (etc etc) all the books. (Even got some rare 'uns!)
My favourite book is Witches of Chiswick, my lucky amphibian is an eft, my pet hate is having all my skin peeled off then being dipped in salt, and I'm a Capricorn (not really, I'm a Sagittarian but can't spell it) |
Hello and were very gentle.........sometimes
Another Sagi eh, as Billy Connelly said, half man half horse, licence to shit in the street
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Government and Queen are your only enemies don't be fooled by their plastic smiles |
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Deep Black
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Joined: 12 Apr 2006
Posts: 557
Location: Derby, UK
Display Name: Andi
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| Posted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 6:06 pm Post subject: |
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Hi there 
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Just Have Fun |
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nursewhen
Joined: 06 Feb 2009
Posts: 123
Location: Brum
Display Name: Helen
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| Posted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 7:32 pm Post subject: |
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Hello and welcome
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reddragon70
Club Member
Joined: 14 Apr 2006
Posts: 279
Location: Dumfries
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| Posted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 11:35 pm Post subject: |
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Hello and welcome to the coolest, hippest group of book nerds anywhere on earth.
If you get the chance to go to any events (most likely to appear on the Golden Sprout website) DO go. Theyre always a blast and Meeting Robert is a wonderful experience, he is just such a lovely gent. |
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Lazio Woodentop
Joined: 17 Apr 2009
Posts: 28
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Sat Apr 18, 2009 12:05 am Post subject: |
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I'd love to go to one of the events and I'd love to meet Lord Bobby.
So when's the next Tokyo one happening? 
_________________
Ya buyin' all the products that they're sellin' ya.
Believin' all the lies that they're tellin' ya
They say "Jump", ya say "How high?"
Ya brain-dead. Ya got a feckin' bullet in ya head. |
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Lazio Woodentop
Joined: 17 Apr 2009
Posts: 28
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Sat Apr 18, 2009 5:34 am Post subject: |
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It's a well-known fact to those who know it well, that it's a tradition (or an old charter or something) for newbies to demonstrate their knowledge of the writings of the Man himself.
So here are 12 cryptic clues to Robert Rankin books. What are the books?
Rankin'
1-2 correct = A vindictive grudge-bearing wee bastard
3-4 correct = A psychic masturbator
5-6 correct = A comic dick
7-8 correct = A hocus bloke
9-10 correct = A guru's Guru
11-12 correct = The most amazing man (woman/Phnaarg) who ever lived
1. Sproutlore jackanory
2. Woof bang crash!
3. Shiva, Capone and the Merciless will be along shortly
4. Poet paint he mixed
5. Suburb cricket pitch witnessed killings
6. He foresaw pet lunch
7. Speedy shag followed by downhill food
8. Robert Rankin
9. We hear emotion after religious festival
10. Offcut finns I damaged
11. The biggest bragger sounds like French egg
12. Deranged as clay poop
_________________
Ya buyin' all the products that they're sellin' ya.
Believin' all the lies that they're tellin' ya
They say "Jump", ya say "How high?"
Ya brain-dead. Ya got a feckin' bullet in ya head. |
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Timmeh!
Site Admin
Joined: 17 Mar 2006
Posts: 849
Location: Brighton (well, Hove actually)
Display Name: Tim McGregor
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| Posted: Sat Apr 18, 2009 8:47 am Post subject: |
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1. Website Story
2. A Dog called Demolition
3. Waiting for Godalming
4. The Antipope
5. Brentford Chainstore Massacre (this one didn't quite work "Suburb cricket pitch ripped killings" would've been better)
6. Nostradamus ate my hamster
7. Couldn't quite work this one out, so I'll leave something for the others
8. The Most Amazing Man Who Ever Lived (creep  )
9. We hear emotion after religious festival
10. Snuff Fiction
11. The Greatest Show Off Earth
12. Apocalypso
[edit to correct number 8]
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Last edited by Timmeh! on Sat Apr 18, 2009 8:56 am; edited 1 time in total |
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A Random Me
Club Member
Joined: 25 Mar 2006
Posts: 1305
Location: Hemel Hempstead
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| Posted: Sat Apr 18, 2009 8:47 am Post subject: |
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Welcome aboard.
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A Random Me
"If Plan A will result in a smoking crater where the city used to be, they'd probably like if you came up with a Plan B." |
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Lazio Woodentop
Joined: 17 Apr 2009
Posts: 28
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Sat Apr 18, 2009 8:55 am Post subject: |
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Ooh! Very good.
Just 2 to get. Numbers 7 & 9.
7. Speedy shag followed by downhill food
9. We hear emotion after religious festival
_________________
Ya buyin' all the products that they're sellin' ya.
Believin' all the lies that they're tellin' ya
They say "Jump", ya say "How high?"
Ya brain-dead. Ya got a feckin' bullet in ya head. |
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Timmeh!
Site Admin
Joined: 17 Mar 2006
Posts: 849
Location: Brighton (well, Hove actually)
Display Name: Tim McGregor
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| Posted: Sat Apr 18, 2009 9:00 am Post subject: |
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Oh I missed 9 somehow, It's East of Ealing
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Lazio Woodentop
Joined: 17 Apr 2009
Posts: 28
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Sat Apr 18, 2009 9:15 am Post subject: |
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| Timmeh! wrote: | | 5. Brentford Chainstore Massacre (this one didn't quite work "Suburb cricket pitch ripped killings" would've been better) |
_________________
Ya buyin' all the products that they're sellin' ya.
Believin' all the lies that they're tellin' ya
They say "Jump", ya say "How high?"
Ya brain-dead. Ya got a feckin' bullet in ya head. |
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Timmeh!
Site Admin
Joined: 17 Mar 2006
Posts: 849
Location: Brighton (well, Hove actually)
Display Name: Tim McGregor
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| Posted: Sat Apr 18, 2009 9:15 am Post subject: |
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A few more; these might be a bit harder.
1. Person with no belief in the supernatural on mantra image.
2. The ball pertinent to the pidgin profanity of the Loa.
3. Cockney party for Gaia
4. Arnie's most famous character from Brooklyn?
5. I've 'ad sufficient lies.
6. Malapropist Sucker is confused
7. Surbiton Necronomicon
8. Surgeon's entourage
9. Old-fashioned burnt river-crossing, attempt viewpoint we hear.
10. Lent Lindt treats from Meggido?
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Lazio Woodentop
Joined: 17 Apr 2009
Posts: 28
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Sat Apr 18, 2009 9:30 am Post subject: |
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1. Waiting for godalming?
2. Dance of the voodoo handbag?
3. Knees up mother earth
4. Toyminator
5. Book of ultimate truths?
6. Sprout mask replica
7. Brightonomicon
8. Fandom of the operator
9. Couldn't quite work this one out. I'll leave something for the others, too
10. Hollow chocolate bunnies....
_________________
Ya buyin' all the products that they're sellin' ya.
Believin' all the lies that they're tellin' ya
They say "Jump", ya say "How high?"
Ya brain-dead. Ya got a feckin' bullet in ya head. |
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